July 23, 2012
Dear Flower,
- I am no longer an involuntary patient at the mental health clinic i have been living at since early June. I applied for a Review Board Hearing, and, after which, i became voluntary as per the decision of the Review Board.
- I will be moving to my new place today, which will consist of a couple rooms i will be renting in a house (one for me, one for Brooklyn) and the sharing of the rest of the house, owned by Steve, who i think is a great guy. This is where i've been wanting to move to since being brought to the hospital. I already paid him $600 rent to cover May 15 to June 15.
- I will not be "mentally deteriorating" as suggested by my doctor. I will be living a happy, good life as i have been for the last 8 to 10 years. I am a perfectly normal person who deserves to go back to his life.
- I'm not sure what staying at the mental health clinic actually accomplished, but i am probably a stronger person because of it. Also, i will continue taking *all* my medication, even Olanzapine, even though it's usage is generally considered for schizophrenia. I find Olanzapine actually extremely helpful with addressing my anxiety, and i have been told numerous times that it is good for that as well. I can literally feel it helping with my anxiety. So, that works out fine for me.
- I said in a previous blog post that, whenever i *do* get my freedom back, i'm going to have a new found love and appreciation for it. I definitely will be taking my life even more seriously from now on. It's a shame that, in this country, you can be "detained" for not even doing anything wrong. I am so happy about the Review Board's decision. They made the right decision.
- As for the police, i will be doing the best i can to get to the bottom of their justification for treating me the way they did. I don't even want to *think* about that right now. There's something really fishy about that, and it stinks, and i don't even want to be thinkin' about the stink 'til after i'm out and enjoying my freedom.
- I'm glad to know that i'm finally moving in to the place i've been wanting to move into. I might be getting a new laptop soon too. It would be kinda difficult to do freelance work if i don't have a laptop.
- I am going to be following a very strict life, even when it comes to addiction to coffee. Because i believe that's what's best for me as a whole. I am *into* doing what's best for my brain. I will be using a lot of self-control and discipline.
- According to the psychiatrist here at this mental health clinic, i have schizophrenia (a diagnosis i believe was influenced by my parents' attempt to make me look bad). I don't have schizophrenia. And i will be looking for second opinions.
- From now on, and for the rest of my life, i expect to be very regular and punctual with my meditations--that's 3 times a day, for at least 20 minutes at a time.
- I will never again turn to any street drug (or even alcohol) to help me deal with my anxiety, to help me have successful social experiences. The medication and my own personal happiness should be more than enough to help me find a life partner and be successful with my web design business.
- Never again will i be getting mad at ~Sir~. There's no reason to. And that's between me and ~Sir~.
Thanks for reading... until next time, God Bless....
~Mark
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